Is very very sick

DEAR BLOG,

Mauro is really making everyone annoyed. He has been out for few days sick. When he sends in his little email saying that he still isn't well, and won't be coming in, many of the people here respond and wish him well.

The problem? He doesn't respond to any of those, he should respond with a simple "thanks" or "ok, i will drink more fluides" or "great idea, I will take some zinc" but instead he doesnt respond to anything, so people aren't sure that he has received their well wishes!

Also, he went to the dr.s and quoted the dr as saying "oh my!" when the doctor looked into his mouth, so now he is showing off how sick he is. He is also telling people to go get a strep test because he has been sick with it for so long and been infecting everyone.

Jason

Doesn't tell people im 34

DEAR BLOG,

Today someone asked Mauro how old I was. He said "Why dont you ask him," when he should have just said "35"

Thanks for making me out to be all old n stuff.

Jason

Brings in Breakfast Tacos

DEAR BLOG,

This morning Mauro really made me mad. Its Friday, so I brought in amazing doughnuts from Dunkin Doughnuts, but he brought in really fancy breakfast tacos. So everyone got full on the breakfast tacos and only Michael ate some doughnuts.

Thanks for ruining my moment of office glory. hope you have a good weekend.

jason

Leaves a Meeting, Comes Back with Banana Bread

DEAR BLOG,

Yesterday I was in a pretty important meeting with Mauro and someone else. Mauro left for some reason, then returned eating a slice of Sarah's banana bread. He didn't explain why or why he didn't bring any for us. I was very surprised when I saw the banana bread, and Im sure it threw off our new employee as well.

Dude, bring back banana bread for everyone, or eat it in the hall.

Jason

Underwhelmed Keith

DEAR BLOG,

Today, in the conference room during lunch Mauro was making everyone look a sonic boom pictures. He also kept picking the lamest youtube videos. Keith finally told him that he was leaving because he was underwhelmed. dude. keith usually brings his lunch, and eats at his desk. this is probably why.

Jason

ps. just now Mauro gave me the wrong dimensions for a tv, so i had to recut something. ugh.

Doesn't hope i get better

DEAR BLOG,

So im sick. I sent a note around letting everyone at the office know that i wont be coming in. I got a couple great emails back wishing that i get better soon, or that i just "feel better" , someone even demanded that i "get better!"

What well wishes do i get from Mauro? Nothing. thanks man. if i dont get better some of it will now be your fault.

jason

Leaves work really fast.

Dear Blog,

Mauro just left the office in a hurry.

I am stuck here, but he made some kind of fancy last minute plans with his wife i think that are not on his calendar, and took off.

Dude, if you dont tell me these things, and they aren't the calendar then I don't have much time to prepare to join you. Not cool!

Jason

Doesn't want to work on LABOR day

Dear Blog,

So today I txted mauro and told him that I would like him ton come in and to help me drill concrete tomorrow at our office. Seeing that tomorrow is LABOR day, where we are supposed to work a little extra hard, I didn't see a problem. Anyway, so he txted back that he has a bunch of stuff to do with his family. Dude. "Labor day" is the same as "work"day if you made a mistake not telling your family that I might txt you last minute to come in and drill concrete on a national holidy I don't see why i have to be the victim.

whatever. i hope you have a nice "labor" day.

Wears a Very Bright Yellow Shirt, Needs attention

Dear Blog,

Today after the huge earthquake, Mauro needed a beer (i guess being in front of us in the stairwell made him thirsty).

So we went to Fireworks and sat outside. For some reason, Mauro wore a VERY bright yellow shirt to work. So, of course, it attracted a huge swarm of Mosquitoes that only attacked him, so it wasnt a big deal to anyone else, except that he kept waving his arms, slapping his head, and brushing the mosquitoes off his shirt, which also kinda stained his shirt. It was very annoying and everyone noticed...which is what he probably wanted.

Always needs to be the center of attention.

Jason

Was in front of me going down the stairs during the earthquake

Dear Blog,

Yesterday during our huge earthquake we had to evacuate our building, and since we were on the 12th floor, we had to take the stairs and it took forever to get out. Sooo I had a long time to figure out why Mauro was in front of me by at least 8 stairs, how did he get there? when did he run out of the office? he thinks his life is more valuable than everyone behind him? we need to wait for him to get out before we can can get out?

dude. me, women, children and other men first.

Doesn't Agree With Everyone Else

DEAR BLOG,

Yesterday Mauro annoyed all of us when he started ranting about how he is tired of seeing and hearing about Pippa Middleton, the mega hot cutie from the wedding thing.

He was like "no more pippa!" and "she's not that hot" and "she has lots of wrinkles for a 27 year old" We pointed to pictures in US magazine of her in that awesome white dress, and he would only admit that she just has a "hot body"

Dude, Pippa is all around amazing, and we are pretty sure she is super nice, her wrinkles are just from smiling alot, which is a good thing.

Plugs his ears during my awesome story

DEAR BLOG,

Today I was telling everyone in the office about an awesome dream I had last night. I was really into it, so I was talking very loud. I guess Mauro is super busy or something because he was plugging his ears and focusing on something on his computer.

Dude, when I am telling my awesome dream stories to the whole office, you might want to listen to them because sometimes you are in them, and they are very interesting.

Doesn't wave well

Dear Blog

JUST NOW a wife of someone who works here told me that when she was leaving Mauro didn't wave to her. Her husband said "Well he did wave, but not very well"

So there you go, doesn't wave well to women

Jason

Gets a Nicer car than Keith

Dear Blog,

Keith is rarely proud of things, but he does love his new car. It's a lexus i2 something something. So what did Mauro do last week? He goes out and gets the one version better than Keiths, the i3 something, and then tells Keith all about it, and shows him all the cool iphone stuff.

Poor Keith.

Jason

Called the water guy "Boss"

Dear Blog,

Yesterday Mauro was concerned about something with the water cooler installation, so had to talk to the poor guy who had to install it at our office, so Mauro was all "Hey Boss, wondering if you could ..blah blah blah"

Larisa and I overhead this, and Larisa was like "did he just call him "Boss""? and then Larisa spilled crazy glue on the conference table.

Dude. Keith is your Boss not the water guy, and stop distracting Larisa with stuff like that because the table is now messed up.

Keeps touching his jaw

Dear Blog,

I guess Mauro wants us all to know that he has hurt his jaw somehow. He will stand there and rub it and make a little face like it hurts.

So Annoying.

Jason

Doesn't like Coconut Water

Dear Blog,

Because it is an excellent re-hydrator Mauro bought some Coconut water, tasted it and then complained about it. A couple things to note. He didnt let it get cold enough and he drank it straight from the container. I dont really see how that is giving it a chance man, it has more electrolytes than gatoraid.

jason