DEAR BLOG,
Mauro's left eye is all messed up. We noticed that it was kinda red and gucky a couple weeks back, we challenged him about it, and he claimed he didn't know. Now it kinda looks like his has been crying in one eye, and he will occasionally pull out this weird ointment and dab it on.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Keeps Birthdays a secret
DEAR BLOG,
Today was the best day ever. Other people in the office are finally seeing through Mauro’s slick facade due to his flagrant uncoolness. Today he knew it was Michael’s birthday, but did nothing about it. Instead he decided to keep the information a secret until I accused him of knowing about it. We could have gotten a cake and everything!
Happy Birthday Michael…Sorry Mauro completely ruined it.
Jason
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Will not Drive Cross Country with Me
DEAR BLOG,
Yesterday I shared with Mauro that I want to sell my part of the business and buy a couple used Limousines.
He thinks this is a great idea, but when we started looking kick ass Limos, we discovered that some of them are located all the way out in L.A.
He thought this was a bad thing (since we are in DC). I was like "No Man, this is awesome, you and I will go out there, and we can drive it back and have like the most awesome cross country trip ever! Since the limo can hold like 24 people, we can sleep in it and live out of it for a week!"
He still refused to acknowledge that this was a great idea, and started looking in New Jersey for limos.
Yesterday I shared with Mauro that I want to sell my part of the business and buy a couple used Limousines.
He thinks this is a great idea, but when we started looking kick ass Limos, we discovered that some of them are located all the way out in L.A.
He thought this was a bad thing (since we are in DC). I was like "No Man, this is awesome, you and I will go out there, and we can drive it back and have like the most awesome cross country trip ever! Since the limo can hold like 24 people, we can sleep in it and live out of it for a week!"
He still refused to acknowledge that this was a great idea, and started looking in New Jersey for limos.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Became "uncool" while I was on Vacation
DEAR BLOG,
Today, my first day back from a 2 week vacation, I told Mauro that I was going to Starbucks in a little bit, if he wanted to go. He was all like "no thank you" and i said "What?!?" and he said "uh..no thank you?"
Not cool.
Today, my first day back from a 2 week vacation, I told Mauro that I was going to Starbucks in a little bit, if he wanted to go. He was all like "no thank you" and i said "What?!?" and he said "uh..no thank you?"
Not cool.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Doesn't Work Extra Hard When Im on Vacation
DEAR BLOG,
I am at the beach for 2 weeks, so Mauro should know that he has to do a whole bunch of extra stuff around the office to make up for it. I called him the other day to ask him to do a bunch more stuff, and he was all like "well uh ok, I uh, don't know anything about that project, or uh..client, but I guess i can lead the meeting" . yeah. thats right man, step up, wing it! just figure it out when the client comes in. stop being all weak and scared about it.
anyway, i had to ask sara to also attend cause he was very nervous.
Jason
I am at the beach for 2 weeks, so Mauro should know that he has to do a whole bunch of extra stuff around the office to make up for it. I called him the other day to ask him to do a bunch more stuff, and he was all like "well uh ok, I uh, don't know anything about that project, or uh..client, but I guess i can lead the meeting" . yeah. thats right man, step up, wing it! just figure it out when the client comes in. stop being all weak and scared about it.
anyway, i had to ask sara to also attend cause he was very nervous.
Jason
Doesn't Know What He's Talking About
DEAR BLOG,
Today Mauro sent an email to everyone about Baby Names and sent a link to the baby names database and said that a baby name was "normal" and "popular" when it is in fact neither.
Get a clue man
Today Mauro sent an email to everyone about Baby Names and sent a link to the baby names database and said that a baby name was "normal" and "popular" when it is in fact neither.
Get a clue man
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Told Me to Cut My Own Hair, makes my kids cry.
Dear Blog,
Well he really did it this time. As most of you know, Mauro cuts his own hair in the shower. He has clippers and runs them over his scalp a couple times a week I guess. This would be fine, but he touts it at work, and told me I should do it.
So today I tried it, and it was a complete disaster. I now have to wait for my wife to come home and fix it, or wait until tomorrow so I can take the clippers to work and have mr.perfect hair cut it for me. Regardless, before it gets fixed, I'm sure my kids will see me and cry. Thanks for my worst haircut ever and making my kids cry, man.
Well he really did it this time. As most of you know, Mauro cuts his own hair in the shower. He has clippers and runs them over his scalp a couple times a week I guess. This would be fine, but he touts it at work, and told me I should do it.
So today I tried it, and it was a complete disaster. I now have to wait for my wife to come home and fix it, or wait until tomorrow so I can take the clippers to work and have mr.perfect hair cut it for me. Regardless, before it gets fixed, I'm sure my kids will see me and cry. Thanks for my worst haircut ever and making my kids cry, man.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Keeps Changing his Order
DEAR BLOG,
Yesterday Mauro (who had a birthday and started working out since I last wrote) went with us to Starbucks. First, he refused to buy me a coffee, even though he owes me $2, he said he would "buy me one another time". Ok, so he ordered the coffee or whatever, and took a long time, he was fumbling around, decided he also wanted an Oatmeal/Raisen cookie, and got his words all mixed up, the guy behind the counter was tired of him almost immediately.
So he finally gets his order in, and gets his cookie. Then it is (finally) my turn to order, I breezily and easily step up and order an iced coffee with milk. I heard Mauro say "oh..oh..ohhh man.." and run down to the place where the barrista's are making the drinks. I'm not exactly sure what was being said, but he was waving his arms a bunch and pointed to the sign that is promoting "Iced Coffee with Milk".. CLEARLY changing is order...after most people would admit it was too late. anyway, they hate him there.
Yesterday Mauro (who had a birthday and started working out since I last wrote) went with us to Starbucks. First, he refused to buy me a coffee, even though he owes me $2, he said he would "buy me one another time". Ok, so he ordered the coffee or whatever, and took a long time, he was fumbling around, decided he also wanted an Oatmeal/Raisen cookie, and got his words all mixed up, the guy behind the counter was tired of him almost immediately.
So he finally gets his order in, and gets his cookie. Then it is (finally) my turn to order, I breezily and easily step up and order an iced coffee with milk. I heard Mauro say "oh..oh..ohhh man.." and run down to the place where the barrista's are making the drinks. I'm not exactly sure what was being said, but he was waving his arms a bunch and pointed to the sign that is promoting "Iced Coffee with Milk".. CLEARLY changing is order...after most people would admit it was too late. anyway, they hate him there.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Jumped the gun on the rope belt
DEAR BLOG,
Today I noticed that Mauro is wearing a bright white rope belt. He is kinda trying to hide it under his shirts, but the tip of the end of the belt is peaking out from under his shirts. You can see it easily because it is so white, it is either new (i didn't notice it last year) or he has bleached it recently. Anyway, it is pretty cold out, and still kinda early Spring in DC, so the bright white rope belt shouldn't make an appearance until after memorial day, and even then shouldn't be worn, like he has today, with white shoes, white pants and a white coat. Here comes Summer Time Mauro! A too little early dude.
Jason
Today I noticed that Mauro is wearing a bright white rope belt. He is kinda trying to hide it under his shirts, but the tip of the end of the belt is peaking out from under his shirts. You can see it easily because it is so white, it is either new (i didn't notice it last year) or he has bleached it recently. Anyway, it is pretty cold out, and still kinda early Spring in DC, so the bright white rope belt shouldn't make an appearance until after memorial day, and even then shouldn't be worn, like he has today, with white shoes, white pants and a white coat. Here comes Summer Time Mauro! A too little early dude.
Jason
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Says Sara will smell like Meat
DEAR BLOG,
Yesterday Mauro interfered in a conversation I was having with Sara. Sara is a kinda vegetarian and I was trying to get her to goto this awesome restaurant that serves meat on huge skewers. I have not been there, but really want to go. She was concerned that she would leave the restaurant and "smell like meat" but I was like "noooo...you will be fine, they cook all the meat in the back, no problem" and Mauro was like "You will definitely smell like meat."
Come on dude, what is your problem? The restaurant looks so cool.
Yesterday Mauro interfered in a conversation I was having with Sara. Sara is a kinda vegetarian and I was trying to get her to goto this awesome restaurant that serves meat on huge skewers. I have not been there, but really want to go. She was concerned that she would leave the restaurant and "smell like meat" but I was like "noooo...you will be fine, they cook all the meat in the back, no problem" and Mauro was like "You will definitely smell like meat."
Come on dude, what is your problem? The restaurant looks so cool.
Monday, February 9, 2009
Refers to Parents as "The 'Rents"
Today Mauro said that he and his wife (who is a regular reader..HEY! super special shout out!) dropped their children off a "the 'rents." It took everyone a moment to figure out what he meant. He must think its cool to slang the word "Parents".
Sup wit dat dude? Sooo Wack.
Sup wit dat dude? Sooo Wack.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Hates Green
Dear Blog,
Right now I am overhearing Mauro tell everyone he hates the color Green, and he has a turtleneck that he got that he wont wear because he doesn't like green. I think this is him complaining about our company having a St.Patrick's Day party, and he wants to be festive, but can't without wearing Green. What a pain in the ass.
Jason
Right now I am overhearing Mauro tell everyone he hates the color Green, and he has a turtleneck that he got that he wont wear because he doesn't like green. I think this is him complaining about our company having a St.Patrick's Day party, and he wants to be festive, but can't without wearing Green. What a pain in the ass.
Jason
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